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“Doctor, doctor, will I be able to play the violin after the operation?”
“Yes, of course…”
“Great! I never could before!”
A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!”
“Is this her first child?” the doctor Asks.
“No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her husband!”
Doctor: I have some bad news and some very bad news.
Patient: Well, might as well give me the bad news first.
Doctor: The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.
Patient: 24 HOURS! That’s terrible!! What could be worse? What’s the very bad news?
Doctor: I’ve been trying to reach you since yesterday.
Doctor: You are very sick.
Patient: Can I get a second opinion?
Doctor: Yes, of course! You are very ugly too.
Patient: Doctor, doctor, I think I am losing my memory!
Doctor: When did that happen?
Patient: When did what happen?
Why did Dracula go to the doctor?
He couldn’t stop coffin!
Patient: Doctor, doctor, I’ve got a strawberry stuck in my ear!
Doctor: Don’t worry; I have some cream for that.
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